Dear Diary,
I just put on this new CD that I bought, and sat in the middle of the couch for about a half hour before I realized that I haven't moved a muscle in the past half hour. Staring at the Christmas tree, one finger on my lips, I wondered what the future holds. "Jesus Christ, is my life always going to be like this?" Then I realized that this notion is absurd. Since when is life consistant? What makes me think that I will be frozen in this state forever? I've only really been frozen for about a half hour. But I worry. Worry about life being an exhausting uphill battle, with at times, insufficient rewards.
So I go to Bikram's Yoga. To build strength. I have to admit though, every time I go, I think, "wow this sucks I am going to pass out." But then I keep going. Because being really hardcore is ideal.
Love,
Diana