Dear Diary,
Because my friends don't call me back, i have had all this time to myself. i'm actually excercising and yesterday i had this "holy crap i have hella muscles" revelation that just motivates me to work harder. it helps not having a car and having to walk like 2 and a half miles home after an 8 hour shift on my feet. i suppose i could take the bus but it always seems like a waste of money. silly considering that it is only a dollar fifty. but that's pretty much paying someone to get me out of some fresh air and a healty walk. but anyway cry me a river freeburg. there are probably people in southeast asia who have never been in cars or something. Me, at home with my parents, crosstraining for the first time in my life, reminds me of when dudes go to jail for a few years and get all buff lifting dumbells because that's all there is to do. pretty soon i'll be taking creatine daily and making myself smoothies with raw eggs.
What worries me is, if my friends from highschool continue to not return my calls, i won't be able to call them my friends for very much longer, that would be pathetic of me. clinging to people who don't care about me enough to call me just makes me feel bad about myself. it seems that slowly letting some of my favorite people in the world fall off my radar is inevitable. sad. why is it so hard to be loved back sometimes.
Love,
Diana