Dear Diary,
So my new weakness, (it's always something) is Saved by the Bell on DVD. I haven't watched it since I was about ten. But it's still funny. maybe funnier. actually definitely funnier, because it is so dated. now that i'm twenty i can say things are dated, you see. The thing that i like about it is, it's so un-pc. Mr. Belding bribes Zack to get him out of detention if he goes out on a date with his niece, Zack cheats on everything, Zack lies to his girlfriend all the time. Slater calls Jessie "Mama" and she calls him a pig. every episode! in every episode like at least four of these things happen. I should write a paper about how after school television has changed with the new millenium. another example, Slater only has like 3 pairs of pants. this would never happen on the OC or something! new outfits, every scene practically! paradigm shift, if you will?
Maybe i could write a speech about it. I'm apparently really good at speeches. My head is all inflated after my speech about gay penguins. it went pretty well. i'm pretty pleased.
Love,
Diana

Dear Diary,
So there is this girl from my highschool who has facebook friended me three times and i have rejected her three times. I'm sorry, but if all i know you as is the girlfriend of that one dude who did tech for theatre productions, that is not enough. wait now that i think about it she might have been on the golf team with me. but either way, you think she would have had enough of rejection by now. I don't want to be your facebook friend if i can't remember a single interaction with you. my sole exception is people with the last name freeburg. who i search for periodically. because they are obviously my long lost cousins.
I only drink VOSS water now because i saw in intouch weekly that tom cruise is a fan. it's in a glass bottle that is a solid foot tall and a perfect cylinder. i found it at cost plus. 2.99 for a bottle but it's worth it because it is "artesian water from norway" since it is in a foot tall glass bottle it weighs like 10 pounds in my back pack, but it's still worth it because it is "artesian water from norway" WAY better than some of those lame domestic waters like smart water and evian. did you know that evian is "naive" backwards? yeah. really though!
If i ignore the fact that people magazine is sending me bills for a magazine subscription i don't want, the problem will just go away, right? that's what i thought too.
Love,
Diana